Reality Check

I am coming from a culture where life is valued.

Maybe this is because I am removed from death and the dying. Dealing with the dying is not a part of my daily life. It was for a brief moment. But my father had a different personality than the rest of his siblings. He lived life to the fullest, and he clung on to it to till the very end. I did not have to deal with a person who had lost hope.

Maybe I would see things differently if my father had been different. It is easy for me to say that my relatives must give my uncle the will to live. It is difficult for me to see a perspective in which it is better for him to die.

Even before he had the stroke that has left him in need of physical therapy to regain the full use of his left arm and leg, he had nearly lost his eyesight and had difficulty walking. He lacked the desire to deal with his diabetes, and his wife it seems has always been against any serious medical treatment whether it was for her parents or now for her husband.

Should I let it go (my principles and values of life, doing good, being responsible)
and face “reality”?

Taking Action

How do I take action in a social system built upon principles that are different from my own?

I guess my own values are:
-giving love,
-doing good,
-being just,
-fulfilling duty,
-being free,
-having knowledge,
-and taking action.

The values of my family in Pakistan are:
-showing respect,
-not violating a code of honor,
-obeying authority,
-and being fatalistic.

When I told my relatives last night that they can’t let my uncle die like this, that they have to give him hope, and that I will do whatever I can to help, regardless of who gets in my way; I may have let my emotions take over, I raised my voice to those who are older than me. I wasn’t alone in the room. There were other relative there who say that they feel the same as me, that what is going on is not right. But over the past month they have been unable to take action.

So when I said what I said. I expect support.

But instead my cousin tells me that she thinks I should not have raised my voice to an elder. I told her that regardless of what people think about me or what I did, it is more important to save the life of my uncle, that in the end that is the goal. I don’t care if people think of me as disrespectful. I believe that we will be held accountable to God as individuals. And I don’t believe he will punish me for raising my voice to an older cousin and aunt who I believe are inadvertently killing my uncle and relatives who sit idly by letting it happen.